Last night was amazing.
From the moment I woke up, I knew that today was the day. I had that feeling, an over whelment of excitement. Everyone look stunning last night, the room was full of different colours, everyone had a smile and everyone had that feeling too, that the night was going to be good. However, there was something missing, not a physical element, but a part of me.
Do my curls, really energise me? Does straight hair make me more sensible?
Because for that short moment of last night, I did not feel like myself. I felt a bit dull and lifeless and sensible - not something I experience alot. Then something happened and I felt like myself again, it was like having an out of body experience. But I still feel there is something missing, a person, a friend, myself.
Last night, other than that short moment I felt like myself. Right now, I feel like someone else.
That feeling that you get in the bottom of your stomach, telling you something is not quite right - I have it now. I've had it for a while. I want it to go away.
I want everything to be right and to fall into place.
I wish, it could be how it was, except better.
Without the stress, without the fear, with the tension.
I wish, everything could be how it appears in my mind.
In my mind life is perfect. Life is easy, there is no pain, there is no hatred.
Some may think I'm describing heaven, but my mind, is my little piece of heaven
My piece of heaven on earth.
I don't know how I relate last night to heaven, but my feelings of euphoria and complete joy last night made me, feel like me, once more.
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